"There are no rules. We can make them up to suit our needs.  I am not set on specific allowance, but there has to be a connection.  A monthly allowance is a valuation of my self-worth for offering the best of me towards my Sugar Daddy. I do so without jealousy, selfishness, drama, or the demand of his time.  It is also compensation of my valuable time that I’m investing for someone, while knowing from the start that there will never be a serious future.

I am open to anything that is fun, exciting, pleasure filled, and drama free.  However, I cannot be bought.  If there is NO chemistry this will NOT work for either of us!  I am a very physical person and am looking for that to be part of the relationship, but also like a man that can dazzle me with intellect and experience.  I am looking for a partner in crime who loves creating ADVENTURES! "

If this defines what is an ideal arrangement between a SB and a SD, I suppose I am part of it now.

Considering all major factors, having an arrangement seems to work as the best way for me. I know I am too busy to have a traditional date or relationship right now. And honestly, I do not want more pressure coming from another person. It is good to feel loved, pampered, and at the same time, you are having control in your life without having to put another person into account. This do not mean me and Mister are not caring for each other. Maybe the caring just does not involve in everyday-life details, but you know there is an intelligent man right behind you if a crisis comes to you.

Next year can be a challenge though. I will have more time, being part of a bigger community. I guess it might be quite tempting to enter something normal for the first time. But will I? 

Back from France

  Had a wonderful ski trip with Mister over the half-term holidays, feeling refresh and pampered, ready to go to school again on Monday, sort of. 

  I never think we can have such a long trip together, but we made it - an entire week, 7 days. And I can't appreciate more for all the things he organised for me in this trip. This is my first time for skiing, absolutely love it and will definitely go back for more next year. 

  It was a lovely stay, feeling productive is great. Went to ski school in the morning, while Mister is doing his house hunting or skiing, and have our special snooze or do some work together in the afternoon, follow by a nice dine out in the evenings. 

 I get a bit upset when we are flying back to London on the plane, so difficult to hold my tears up, but I don't think Mister saw it. It is very upsetting to end a holiday, in which you are so used to wake up next to the person you like, and sleep tight in his arms at night. Particularly for a lonely person like me. 

 I was kind of scared when I woke up this morning, realising no one is there next to me. And I started weeping, acting completely like a child who can't find her daddy (what a wimp!). So I text Mister, saying 'I miss him.' ... And tearing up more as I get 'Me too.' back from him. 

 I think I am getting much more attached to him after this trip. Almost, I almost say the 'three words, eight words' one night to him, but I managed not to. Those three words seem to be a huge pressure on people, I wasn't sure. 

 Missing him a lot and hope to see him not long later... :-(

What were you looking for?

        What were you looking for?

        Mister and I were lying in bed, talking about our fantasies and now we have a new check-list of places to have sex. Even just fantasizing about these ideas turn on both of us. Then our conversation brought up our individual’s journey through the SA site and what were our intentions.

        We think it’s the curiosity, or purely the boredom, or simply the desire of sex life satisfaction (especially for him). But we both agreed on what’s happening now is out of our expectations, nothing like what we were looking for.

        For me, I was expecting a below the average man with some sort of secret fetish, whom I will fulfill his desire in exchange of some spare money, so I don’t have to work so many hours in my part-time job, and focus on my study instead.

My intention is much closed to what it is now, but I honestly was expecting something less attached. I always have a preference on man older than me, about 6 – 12 years. Initially I never thought that I would feel something for a man 24 years older than me, especially a married man. And thanks to DJ, I realized it’s OK to feel something for a man, that you are sharing strong intimacy with, even if you are in an arrangement. It’s just the fact you wouldn't say it out loud, because the value of an arrangement is not the feelings you have developed. It is never the feelings that pursue an arrangement.

        As you may know, I am exclusive to Mister. I never intended to be an exclusive SB for only one SD, but I just don’t want to do the searching in the sugar-world again. I might if this arrangement eventually comes to an end, but before that, I don’t want to do anything that might upset Mister who always treats me beyond well. No matter how tempting it is out there, it’s never an excuse.

        Mister, you had no idea how many dates I have rejected for you...

xxxx

2014 will be even BETTER

I'm still amazed by how determined I am to break things off with DJ, and I am so proud that I succeed. And finally I was back on the right track that I intend to be on, achieving good exam results and have my offers now.

2014, you have to be smooth and even better. I really enjoy the calmness in the past few months, and I wish there is not going to be any storms followed by. And I do believe that life can be smooth if you truly determine to. Even though it can be less fun, but overall that's all I ask for. 

At the start of December, I made up this advent calendar game for Mister by sending him SnapChats every day till Xmas day. And he seems to enjoy it a lot, so he ask for more. Now I show him each item I brought from the Xmas sale every day, just one item with nothing else, so it can be just a scarf, a cardigan, anything. Mister gives me good reviews as well, always makes me feel flattered. 

Can't wait to see him when he's back to London...

Today's SnapChat with Mister.

Anyway, have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

XXXXX

A Date with an Old Crush

OK, it wasn't really a date.

A friend of mine from the US, Jason came to London for holiday. Well, he is actually one of my Besties' boyfriend. I know Jason at the same time as my bestie, when we are all still in high school. They have been together for 5 years since then. And he was one of my crushes.

Then we met up today, mainly because I need to be in the central London for sales shopping! We went to Winter Wonderland as well, we did have a great time. Thinking about how disappointed I feel when I knew they got together 5 years ago, and now I am feeling glad that it wasn't me, makes me realized how unpredictable things can go in life.

I think it's not entire representative when they say: ' When people grow, people grow apart. '

In the case of Jason and me, I think we grew closer. Our values became closer, possibly due to similar experiences, lifestyle et cetera. Today was great, but I knew there is no chemistry at all. It could be the fact that I know guys at his age cannot afford what I truly like and enjoy, typically when I already had a taste of all these fine things.

Through our conversation today, I think our values are much more similar. Cannot say they are very good talks, but good enough. I guess if Jason wasn't my bestie's bf, we can be good friends. But you know it's difficult and awkward to be good friends with your bestie's bf.

P.S. Mister and I kind of made a deal to go on a trip on February, as long as I promised to do certain hours of study each day -_- I agreed on that, but when it really comes, we will see. We are not sure about our destination yet... I would love to go to Italy though :)

XXXXX

I want a Summer Internship!

As I am 80% sure that I will be in London next year, I can now proceed to my next step. I have been looking up for a summer internship or anything, so that I can stay in London for part of my summer, instead of being forced to go back home in Asia by my parents for the entire 3 months holiday.

So far I've seen, most of the internships are for undergraduate or for school leavers that intend to start their career after A-levels. I am in neither of these categories, so it is a bit difficult to find one..... I will keep trying though.

Does anyone have any ideas? She can speak Mandarin, Cantonese, English. Prospective Engineering student with an offer, have the rights to work in EU. Also a slim 5'7'' and very presentable.

Happy Holiday and More Surprises!

I got an offer from UCL! I literally screamed when I received the email the other day. This makes me feel much more secure now. At least now I can choose to stay in London next year, in which I always intend to. I have been waiting for over 2 months, so I got quite nervous and a bit stressed out. This is the best gift from Santa this year!

I do ask myself, what is my reason to stay in London? Why is it my first choice? I kept convincing myself that there is more opportunities to find a relevant internship in London, better lifestyle et cetera. But to be honest, I knew Mister is one of the reasons. I never admit it but I assume he knows. Also, even though I am not inside the sugar-bowl right now, I still wouldn't want to stay too far away from it geographically. London is the heart of the sugar-bowl, how can I leave here?

The day after, I received a small parcel from Mister: a lovely card with paragraphs of writings, a pomegranate, a recipe book, two boxes of chocolates from Charbonnel et Walker, and a Wolford gift card. That really makes my day, they are all so meaningful and I can tell the thoughts behind each of them. I am a bit uncertain about whether this is my Christmas present, because he once told me he will get me something after he comes back from France. And he also mentioned 'to help me going over the holiday', so I wasn't sure. I would be slightly disappointed if there isn't anything when he comes back. I know I shouldn't because he already did so much for me in the entire year, but you know women... :-P

I think I am going to have a wonderful Christmas this year, finally. Not sure about New Year, I always get quite upset in New Year's time, but I do hope I will have a great New Year too.

Anyway, Merry Christmas people!

XXXXX