A month has slipped away since the 'breakup', my emotions are less affected than expected. I feel like I have so much more time to do my own thing, even some side projects. Life is great again.
At times I also feel sorry for not feeling sorry about Doctor, and perhaps neither does he... Well, the end of a relationship doesn't mean it has never been a success, at least I made some progress.
- I understand about myself more. Especially that I am a very physical person, also understand that the strong desire of having sex with one person doesn't necessarily mean I actually like them. I guess this is more common for men, or that it is more acceptable for men. Anyway, at least now I am fully acknowledged and accept this fact.
- Not everyone is as nice as Mister, and he is truly exceptional. Now I am sure that, given any choice of men, I would probably still choose him over anyone... Well, under the circumstances that I need to make a choice (lol). It is not random attachment that little girls have, he is really someone very special to me. Not to mention his personality and some traits that I value a lot... If I keep going, I can talk through the list for a day.
- Don't risk staying with a terrible and arrogant person. The sooner you realised that, the earlier you should leave before they make your world ugly. This is exactly how I feel after these 9 months, things have never been so ugly in any of my relationships. Not only that I didn't become a better person, I inherited/exaggerated some bad traits from Doctor too.
- People in standard relationships tend to have ridiculous expectations. How can people expect someone to be committed to something that they can't even do themselves? And even if they can, why do we have to put so much pressure on the other person, asking for the same treatment. It is terrible, terrible, terrible. Some might say it is immature to not take any responsibilities or not caring, and all these equal to meaningless relationship... Again, what is meaningful to me doesn't apply to everyone. Accept it.
- Relationship just takes sooooo much time.
