It's OVER

I broke up with Doctor, sort of.

I believe a person can change his habits/behavior, but there are some personality traits that can't be changed, and they are the things which make you who you really are. For Doctor, his self-centered trait is the main thing killing this relationship. It's all about him at the end of the day.

As if he is only treating me nicely because he wants me to give him something back. Even though he claimed he doesn't expect anything, he is just not the kind of person who has the true kindness that I admired from Mister.

Sometimes I wonder how come I can't see the good in him, perhaps he can't either. I wish there is something else I can hold onto when we are having a bad moment, apart from he can be really nice to me, even just a small one. He is wrong about me giving up easily, I don't. During my relationship with Mister, I had harder and more reasons to give up, but I didn't, because I can always think of many, many reasons that he has to be part of my life. Because of Mister, I became someone I can never imagined myself to be. He is one of the few people who can see the good in me.

All these are pretty overwhelming right now. Thoughts and memories from the past that criss-crossing with each other.

Another thing is Doctor is so full of shits. He can never admit that he doesn't know everything, and he could be wrong. Argh, but I don't care now...


All I need is sleep. If anyone tells you that sleep can't make you feel better, you are not having enough sleep.